Gay Car Geek: 2014 BMW 650i xDrive Gran Coupe vs. 2014 Audi S7 — Battle of the “Ballers”

Like most gays, I love BMWs. And the saucy, muscular 650i Gran Coupe is the BMW equivalent of speedo-clad Joe Manganiello emerging from a tropical lagoon…yeah, I wouldn’t kick it out of bed for eatin’ crackers. But the Audi S7 wins this matchup for a number of reasons: the S7 is arguably just as good-looking as the 650i, albeit in more of a refined, Ryan Gosling sort of way.


It’s also more practical—by a bunch—with a hatchback body that doesn’t sacrifice a shred of style while gaining added utility. The back seat is larger, too, in case you get to take the real Ryan Gosling (or a reasonable facsimile thereof) for a “ride,” and the material quality is simply spectacular, especially if you get the black wood with inlaid aluminum pinstripes. Its sonorous 420-hp V8 and all-wheel drive give nothing to the 650i xDrive’s 445-hp V-8 in the in terms of forward thrust and handling, thanks to a bit less overall vehicle weight, something that also improves fuel economy. Factor in the S7’s base price, which is more than $12K lower than that of an all-wheel-drive 650i xDrive, and it’s “Audios,” BMW, this one goes to the S7.

Renowned automotive journalist and gay car geek Steve Siler has turned his life-long love of cars into an enthusiastic career traveling the world to report on new automobiles as they are introduced. Siler pioneered automotive writing for the LGBT community in the late 1990s and is a regular contributor to Car and Driver Magazine,, AOL Autos, Yahoo! Autos, and the New York Daily News. You can follow his musings @silerroad on Twitter.